A man in the house

Dearest Santi left me, left Suisse for good. I woke up alone today, cooked and ate alone. Suddenly, I am no longer used to being alone. It was good to have him and others around, especially a man in the house. He helped me with many stuff and he made me feel that I am after all, a girl. Still, I’ll learn. I’ll be okay. Clyric talked to me last night and I am glad he understands how I feel. Like in the past, his advices for me always matter. May Santi be happy always and I look forward to our asia tour.

Momo love stayed up till 5am (SG time) just to chat with me. I lied to him about coming home this Jan and you could have seen the delight and ! on his face. Me? I had a tinge of guilt. Probably that’s something I really wish would happen. Remember I said I had alot of dreams ever since I moved to Morlon? Well, I am still having them now and almost all the dreams are about Singapore, Family, and the favorite places and things I would do… To wake up from the dreams on another bed really sucks big time. Someone, please fly me home~

Tom Yum Soup

Dear all,

since the day I moved into my own apt, I’ve learnt how to do some favorite dishes of mine, thanks to Santi & Jane. Because it is so successful, I’ve decided to share the recipe with everyone, especially those who loves to prepare easy meals. Here’s one first!

Ingredients (For one pot, able to serve up to 4):

1. 4 small stalks of chili (Cut it into small pieces)
2. Thai chili oil (1 Table spoon)
3. Tamarind puree (wet) (1/2 Teaspoon) If you like the soup to be more sour, then you can add more.
4. Tomyum Paste (2 Table spoon)
5. Fish Sauce
6. Chicken stock (optional) (2 pinch)
7. Sugar (1 pinch)
8. 1 medium onion (Slice it)
9. 3 cloves of garlic (Slice it or chop into small pieces)
10. Chicken/pork or fish slices (Depending on what kind of meat you like) (Slice into small mouth-bite sizes)
11. Straw mushroom
12. Enoki mushroom and all other vege you like
13. Lime juice

Amount of meat and vegetables depends on how much you can eat.

Steps:

1. Add a little oil to heat the pot
2. Add garlic, onion, chili padi, chili oil and fry together
3. When garlic turns brown, put in chicken slices or other meat and then fry again.
4. When meat is cooked, add in water till 3/4 of the pot.
5. When the water boiled, add in mushroom and other vegetables
6. Pour 1 round of fish sauce
7. Add in Tamarind
8. Add in tom yum paste
9. Add in optional chicken stock and sugar while adjusting the taste
10. Add in little bit of lime juice

*Take note: If you are cooking fish, it will go last. Also, all the sauces and ingredients may not be fixed. You can add more according to the taste and portion you want it to be. Just taste as you cook! It’s that easy!

In Jocelyn's style

 I added my fav bean curd skin and some misc!

Bon Appétit!

Smile because it happened

As always heard and said, “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened”. It was tragical to say goodbye. So hard to hold the tears, so much appreciation to express but didn’t know how to. Life is not about knowing. I didn’t know I would be able to cross your life as how you did to mine. As much as I might like things to stay the same, we have to face the change. You may seem to be at a great distance from me now, but I will never ever be defeated by the time and distance. You know what, all the mountains, valleys, and water  in the world cannot separate friends whose hearts are as one. 

Someday, somewhere…

Happy trails to you, until we meet again!

Prayers answered

The wait was a pain in the arse. And the pain in the arse was a prolonged one. Man..I didn’t expect my results to be released today. I passed every single !#$% subjects!!!! No more intense stifle, only great relief! In my academic life so far, this phase has been the hardest especially since I am a direct entry student and I felt lousy after each paper. Almost every paper was difficult for me and I had doubts in passing. But I made it! I maybe lower than alot of students but I have promised myself that if I passed, I will help all my friends who are going to do their resits. It is sad to know that my surrounding friends have to do resits but surely, I wouldn’t be just watching. I want all of us to progress to the next final semester in Glion.. I hope I can be at help.

Thanks to those who made my six semester a better one. The family and friends who believed in me. To others, chocolates, bananas, sweets, chicken essence are their strength during examinations. Mine however is the strength and faith everyone else had in me. Not to forget my own determination…This semester is a helluva crazy ride and I have finally reached the safe zone!!!

Everyone, please be happy for me!

Jungfraujoch

The highest point in Europe.

It was snowing quite heavily and we had difficulties in breathing… Nonetheless, the experience is exciting. But will I go again? Yes, maybe in March when it stops snowing… and with that special someone.

Route De Morlon

I finally moved to my apartment- Studio House. Still cleaning up…

And this is the only place to survive winter. ^^

Want to do a house warming, but there is no one around. Anyway, having bad dreams recently… I’ll write more later. Have to shop for the house. Goodbye!

Love #6

Love fades but it isn’t recycled.

Suddenly, the emotions have taken its toil on me even though the love is long gone.

First, you took a girl on your bike and there I was holding on to the “Yes, I still want to be with you” after sorting out the thoughts when I was away from you, away from home. I had nothing else to say but that’s okay. Second, you threw away everything I made and you say you had no choice and that’s okay. Then you say the same words to others. Maybe you run out of lines to melt the heart, and that’s okay. Sometime later, your bestfriend came to me and told me you placed me as a bet and that’s okay really. After that, your gf laughs at our past and you went on to deny that the song was about me. I wonder, is it that shameful to have loved me? I don’t think I need you to remember me, I was just hoping that you remember your past which makes you a better person, a better lover now. It hurts to know that you won’t acknowledge the love we had. Today, I discovered a new denial. You are still wearing number “8″ just like 7 years ago when you did it for me. But I didn’t expect you to say that the number doesn’t have a meaning now…what is most important is the player. I am confused and somehow I wish to know the truth. Why are you still holding on to that even though your favorite is 13 and her favorite is 10. Then why would you bear to let others laugh at our past, your own relationship? Everyone has a past and why can’t we have it beautiful? There is not even a single thing left to remember, not even a picture, so why can’t we just lock up the memories?

Now you even recycle the love we had and you tell me is this okay? We were young but our feelings were real enough that I will remember even when I grow old. Just remember that I will never recycle our love. I will never go to the same place with the new love to do the same things or to say the same words. And I will never deny that I was once madly in love with you even though we both knew that we are from different worlds. I will never laugh along with people who laugh about our past, and most importantly, you can never hear me say that our relationship is just another relationship.

It is not a fictional story.

FoxTown

I think I must be crazy, to have travelled more than 4 hours just to go to FoxTown @ Lugano, 50km from Milan. At FoxTown there are 160 prestigious stores, 250 big brands at factory prices. According to myswitzerland.com, ‘Big brands for small prices’ is their motto. Since the Factory Outlet Center shopping is already a proven theory in the United States these retailers offer the most famous international brands at cost price directly to the customer, with a discount from 30% to 70%.

 Having said this much, I am very disappointed to announce that I bought NOTHING. Most of you would already know that I am not an active shopaholic, and given the time and money, I still wouldn’t crave for it much. Today, I travelled with 3 girls. The 3 girls have different habits. X has her shopping list, Y just wants to get her gucci wallet, ck undergarments, Z will just leisure walk and get anything which pleases her eyes. Dear me just wanted to EAT. My eating list was expresso, cappuccino, tiramisu, spaghetti, ok, actually any Italian menu would be good. Haha.

So with different goals for the day, all of us separated upon reaching the mall. I strolled around, got bored after 10 minutes and America is the reason why. Don’t even have to compare to NewYork, but Orlando Premium Outlets are way way better than this FoxTown. Mother and Jane is the second reason. They always give good shopping advices and I realised I cannot shop without them around. Third reason is because of my physical appearance. I am not trying to self-pity here, but you would know that given my height and size, I have to dress carefully and more often than not, I cannot take branded goods. Tsk…it’s really hard for me to look nice and fashionable. So I gave up shopping and I went to find food…and, NO GOOD FOOD. My eating list basically became a dream to be trashed. In the end, I looked at the clock and poor me still have more than 3 hours to go therefore I ended up at the salon! Don’t bother asking me how much it costs me…

and it didn’t quite make my face less rounder.

At the end of the shopping trip, X spent more than 700 swiss francs which is about 1k sgd and she is the happiest girl tonight because she accomplished her shopping list. Y’s gucci wallet went out of stock and she ended up buying misc stuff including Ferrari’s cool red cap which I like! Z bought a pair of leather shoes from Tod’s (btw I wanted one pair too but NO SIZE, but I’ll hunt it down when I go to Italy with family), and I bought myself a new look.

However, this is not the end because there will be a part 2,3, 3.5…for the girls and I shall create a better eating list.

*evil laugh*

The White Black Keys

I don’t think it is good to be on a vacation. When there is too much time, I use it to miss. I really love the piano, more than anything else. Today, I finally get to play the piano without much distraction. Still, I couldn’t really express myself. I felt uncomfortable even though I get to play. Maybe because it is the school lobby, maybe because I’m not home, but I am sure that the main reason is because it isn’t my piano paco. Y’know, some people say I don’t have nice and long fingers like a pianist. Indeed, my fingers are fat and short, just like the body, still, I was able to adapt to paco. I can do more than an octave on paco. Paco has been with me for 16 years and suddenly 6 months without it feels empty. There is nothing else I am left with to express myself. 

 

I said before, although I’m not a child prodigy like Mozart, not a composer like chopin or Schubert, not a deaf pianist like Beethoven, not a blind like Handel, not a famous orchestral composer like Tchaikovsky, not a performer like Haydn, I don’t think my interest or love for piano is any lesser. To most children, playing with toy soldiers, dolls or hopscotch & zero-point are part of their growing up…However, learning how to play the piano was mine.

Seriously, can I come home soon? Maybe march? Even if it’s a week?

I played new scores and some favs today…Air on the G String, To Zarnakand, Sweet Bye And Bye, Kiss the rain, Now and Forever, Right here waiting, Wonderful Tonight, Canon In D and of course all time favorite Marriage D’Amour…

True Identity

Here, I am defending myself and my family and the rest of all humankind you tend to judge. I am not doing this because I think I owe you an explanation. Further more, I owe zero explanation to people who judge. I am sure you were affected when strangers judge you, and I am even sure you were once hurt when friends judge you. So don’t they serve as good reminders to you not to do the same towards others? After all, we have gone through this umpteen times and what don’t you get?

All the shits that you may link to calling it “rich”, is not what I live for. When you don’t even know how hard I work hard just to prove that life is more than “rich”. Like I said, you don’t know me so do not assume everything, do not act like you know everything. First, because you are not family. Second, everything you talk about is money and money, rich and poor, and sadly, all these topics aren’t biblical to me. Many times, I feel a need to talk to you because you are important to me. But most of the times, I cannot bring myself to because you can never understand. I can never reveal my true identity to you, and there is no more need to.

I make friends with all kinds of people, rich or poor, ugly or beautiful, smart or stupid and I am sensitive towards how people feel. So you should do the same. You ever said you feel small when you are around rich people, but define rich. Why should you even feel that way? You have heard it many times that money isn’t everything and I do not have to repeat this statement because you are richer than alot of people out there. You have the money you need to live on. You have bread and a bed to sleep on. Your friends may have lesser savings compared to you and for all you know, they are calling you rich behind your back.

Rich is never ending. If one is rich, the other one is even richer. The guy out there may be driving an expensive car but he maybe eating cup noodles in his HDB 3 room flat just to save up for petrol. The girl out there may carry a chanel bag but you may not know that she has been working months for it, and suddenly, all her savings are used up for that one favourite bag. The other guy out there may be gambling off his money as though the money is paper but have you ever think his dad is also a gambler and he is trying to prove something to his dad? The parents out there may give a big sum of money to their son but you don’t know how little they eat, how thrifty they are just to give their son a better life? That rich boy who owns 3 hotels, a cruiseline and a jetplane may be an orphan. All of the mentioned are not just examples I am trying to make up, for I know people like them and their heartfelt feelings. No one is perfect. NO ONE. You do not know the world and its true identity so please, stop judging. I also hope you stop feeling so inferior or whatever other negative feelings you may have being around with people whom you THINK are rich. They didn’t do anything wrong and it’s their life. They don’t owe you and if you cannot keep up to their world, then don’t be with them!

Having said all these, I should start minding my own business too. You can take the above as a pinch of salt and then move on from here, or do whatever deems you fit.. Life is simple only if you do not think too much. Until this moment, I still think you are capable of being successful in life. I think highly of you so do not take all this away and put this friendship of ours to a waste. If you still want to talk, if you still care, then do not tell me how negative you feel towards “rich” people for every examples you gave were indirectly telling me something whether you have the intention or not.

Take care for now and you should feel better off because you are not poor and you don’t know how friends like me enjoy your company without money and appearance in my dictionary.

All considerations of position, wealth and reputation aside, the greatest and most enduring triumph as a human being lies in knowing that one is doing one’s best. -Daisaku Ikeda