Where did the strength come from?

December 10th, 2011 § Leave a Comment

Whilst the stark truth is that hardship and difficulties are inevitable and inescapable, the definitive question may be whether we yield under their weight or use them as an opportunity to better ourselves.

I haven’t been writing.

I have been chasing time and may have lost touch with you but I did not forget. There’s really so much to catch up with. I know there is just so many friends I want to see ever since I return home for good but my time is you know it. No one is rushing me but I feel bad enough that I always have to turn appointments down. I wake up at 6 each day for work and after work, it is either meetings, dance rehearsals, performances, social activities (which usually only happen once in a lifetime for most of them) and the night would end at 1 or 2 and the cycle repeats. Weekends are all the same.

Now the next question is, “You have a choice, why make yourself this busy?”. I would say, if I have a choice, I would only wish there is more than 72 hours a day so that I could do more. I wish for that magic finger- just snap and I can be anywhere I want to. Life is this short and we all know it already, that is why I feel that if I don’t do it now, then when? The things that I do in the initial stages are mostly nothing for my own good. It is always for others’ happiness. Sometimes I do things which are out of my limit, sometimes I pick up tasks that others will not like to do, most of the time, I do things which was impossible for me to. However, after that comes in the later stage of my own good. That tinge of victory and genuine happiness when I know that I have brought the smiles and tears across, that I have made things happen time and time again.

And so I am thankful for the family and friends who is always there to fetch me around just so I could save time and money, to ensure I eat well and have that bit more time to sleep. To the special friends who are always around, the best friend samm, 99, hunny, shermin, halim, redzwan and family, jk, ryan, yatty, banana, and all those I promised to see but have yet to see, please give me more time and continue to understand. It is you. Everyone of you gives me the strength to lead life no matter how hampered I am by the problems and exhaustion.

Striving to realize our dreams is exhausting. But nothing is more satisfying or fulfilling. I once read that one can never become a person of extraordinary character just by leading an ordinary and peaceful life and avoiding difficulties which is why I really think I am somehow extraordinary.